Categories
Competition Entrepreneurs Marketing Software

You are to blame for so-called cheap customers

I hear SO much complaining about price and how people are so cheap that I just can’t stand it anymore.

Look, if price was the only factor in purchasing, everyone would live in a trailer, drive a Yugo, and buy all their clothes at the second hand store or WalMart.

That’s right. Everyone, even the wealthiest in society, would be standing in line at WalMart. Woohoooo!

Imagine your lifeâ?¦

14,352 people in line.

Embarrassed husbands at the register suffering through a broadcast of “Price check on super earthquake size tampons in aisle 71” blaring over a $1.29 half-rotten old ceiling speaker. Of course, it’s in a scratchy, annoying tone of voice.

137 babies crying because they need a nap, a diaper or a meal. 28 of those are crying because the cheapest diapers on the planet are chafing their cute little bottoms.

4621 other kids in line, tugging on mom’s pants leg to get a toy or candy bar, noses dripping.

Some of those noses are getting wiped on a dirty little shirtsleeve.

Some of those kids are getting smacked and told to “shut up!”, while other people in line are thinking “about time they did something” and still others are now ticked off that the parent hit their child.

Doctor Spock and the HR managers in line both cringe, knowing that you praise in public and criticize in private.

Finally, far too many people looking (and smelling) like they hadn’t bathed in a week.

I guess you get the picture by now:)

If price were the only factor in purchasing, every single one of us would be living some version of this make-believe nightmare. But we aren’t, because “price is everything” just isn’t true. Sure, there’s a small percentage of people who buy everything based on price. Maybe 5%.

Everyone else has their price is no object (or not much of an object) moments about something.

  • They dont buy generic orange soda, cuz it tastes like crap compared to Minute Maid orange soda or Orange Crush.
  • They refuse to eat WalMart brand Pop Tarts because they get half the pseudo-fruit of real PopTarts and the fruit you do get is all dried out and not nearly as corn syrup sweetened as a real PopTart.
  • They won’t buy a laptop at Costco because they like the 1900+ pixel-wide, high resolution laptop screens that Dell offers.
  • They buy Marlboros because GPCs and USA Golds really taste awful and make them look “poor”. And of course they want to feel like that cowboy dude that they think every woman is in love with. Hubba hubba.
  • They drive Honda Accords because they like knowing they’re getting a vehicle made in the USA, rather than those junky Brazilian (or Mexican, Korean or whatever) Heartbeat of America Chevrolet mini-cars.
  • They drink Bass ale because it tastes better than Bud, which tastes better than PBR or Keystone Light.
  • They wear a REAL Seiko because only the lamers wear WalMart’s Casio-lookalike. Or a Piaget because everyone thinks their old Rolex is a $39 knockoff.
  • They swing a Callaway Big Bertha because guys like Tiger don’t swing a Wilson Staff.

Ok, enough. I think you get the point by now. Keep in mind that this applies to everything from toilet paper to corporate jets. Unless you have a mental block about what your software is worth.

Much of the time, it’s YOUR fault that price is such a big issue with your products and services, or at least, the perception.

  • You compare price on your website or in your marketing materials.
  • You don’t bother talking about ROI, value, or time saved in distinct, specific terms.
  • You don’t show that the cheaper competitor delivers less stuff, lower quality stuff, and/or delivers in twice the time you do.
  • Your testimonials, if you have any, don’t say factual, specific things that clearly show yours is the product of choice – regardless of that 97 cent difference in price.

Speaking of testimonials, I have NEVER known a business (particularly a software company) that didnt have a testimonial that sounded something remotely like this from at least ONE client:

“We thought Joe’s software was expensive, until we used it. Now it saves us 42 hours of programming time each month, enough to pay for an extra programmer. Our code is more dependable than ever. While it’s hard to quantify that other than by performance, it’s obvious to us because better code means less support – and that’s exactly what our clients have seen. For example, our support calls due to disconnected sessions with the customer’s server have dropped 27% – which means our tech support lines aren’t as busy. Our clients have told us that our support wait time has dropped noticeably, and they’re happy about it. That happened because our support team responds more quickly since we have 27% fewer “dropped session” calls to handle. Finally, our profit for next quarter will improve even more because we can put off hiring another support person for at least another few months – without impacting the quality of the support our clients receive.”

You’ve got clients that have said these things or WOULD say them if you prompted them to tell them why they think you hung the moon. Ask. And then USE them wisely to get the price that makes actually makes it worthwhile to work your keester off.

Your price issues are marketing problems, not client problems. You can fix it. You have to position your product in some way other than “we’re cheaper”. Someone else can always beat your price, then what do you have?

Categories
Competition Entrepreneurs Management Software

More about testing your business

In April 29’s Boston Globe, you might have seen a story discussing Robert Cialdini’s report in May’s Psychology Science.

You do read Psychology Science, right? Ok, maybe that’s a stretch, but I’ll bet you read the Science Daily website. After all, there’s a lot more gold there for the entrepreneur than you might imagine. Don’t read Science Daily? Well, surely you’ve read Cialdini’s classic book “Influence”?  If all those answers were “No”, then start with the book and you’ll see what I mean.

Look, I strongly suggest that you add psychology, at least some regular reading about it, to your arsenal.

Cialdini’s report spoke of the value of using shame in marketing, even in materials that aren’t designed to sell something. Items simply attempting to evoke a behavior – such as asking hotel guests to reuse their towels in order to conserve water and power, or when asking folks to cut down their use of electricity in the summer wherever possible.

Shame, such as “Join your fellow guests in helpingâ?¦the majority of our guests use their towels more than once.” That extra sentence at the end produced better results. Testing.

You may not have realized that psychologists are testers, just like you should be. When they try to figure out why people do what they do, they study and record behavior. IE: Testing. They insist on proper sample sizes, because they want to be sure that the results they get are actually meaningful.

You need to be just as sure when measuring results in your business. In your case, when observing behavior with your product, service, store layout, etc  – your sample sizes can be a good bit smaller than what psychologists use.

As I noted earlier, the education you get about your design will probably surprise you. Hopefully, it’ll be a pleasant surprise for the rest of your clients sometime in the future.

Categories
Competition Entrepreneurs Management Software

“Animal” testing is a good thing

People are animals too:)

On Monday Apr 30, USA Today’s cover story was about a family who agreed to be videotaped and studied by Microsoft staffers in order to see how people used Microsoft’s soon-to-be released Vista (now available, of course), what ticked them off about it, what they liked, and so on.

Read the article to see how hard Microsoft is working to try and make their software easier to use, and quite frankly, better.

Why? If you are in the software business, there’s nothing more educational than watching your clients try to use your software. Sure, being on the tech support line is a close second, but the sheer agony of vicariously trying to get the user to click that button that to you is oh so obvious is well….flippin’ painful.

BUT it is seriously powerful, and that power means several very important things:

  • More, easier sales. An app that people can just sit down in front of and start using without help is an app that’s easier to sell. When someone’s first experience is “DAMMIT, how do you use this thing?!?!?!”, getting from there to a purchase can be tough, don’t you imagine?
  • Less tech support. Your app is easier to use. More intuitive.
  • BETTER tech support. Better questions because the painfully obvious ones (to you) that aren’t so painfully obvious to everyone else have already been taken care of. Better support because there’s less of the stuff caused by less than ideal design decisions that were discovered during your testing.
  • Fewer releases. Because you catch the silly stuff early in the game, and fewer people got to see it, there’s just not much about this that can be considered a negative whether you ask your end users, your support staff or the people in fulfillment.

This past weekend, Sherman Hu told a similar story about his WordPress tutorial videos. He said his focus when making the videos was to enable his father in law to create a blog. He recognized that the average person isn’t a megageek and needs some baseline help in getting started. That’s what the tutorials are all about. He includes a few free videos and if you want to learn more after he gets you started, you can subscribe to the paid portion of his WordPress tutorial video site.

Your audience might not be the same as Sherman’s, but the technique is just as powerful.

Human behavior is predictable if you’re a psychologist. Sort of. Even if you know what you think you know, testing by watching a user will show you facts, not guesses.

Testing with “real live people” isn’t just for software people. I’m sure you are aware that big consumer product corporations do this sort of testing on everything from steak knives to minivans.

Why wouldn’t you?

Back in early March, a friend of mine tested a brand new presentation about a pretty geeky (but non-computer related) topic in front of a group of people who weren’t customers, and weren’t technical people – at least not in his arena. The result? He found that he needed to turn down the techno-speak even more than he expected in order to “keep” the audience, otherwise he risked not only losing them, but his credibility as well.

Test your website. Test your forms and other paperwork. Test the arrangement of products in your store. Until you do, you just don’t know how good or bad your stuff is, nor how much better it can get or how much money you’re losing by having less than optimal design.

TEST as much as you can, with real live “animals”. People, that is.

Categories
Competition Marketing The Slight Edge

Why are you here?

When I saw Joel last night at The System, he asked me what brought me here.

Why would I come to an internet marketing conference?

Several reasons.

1) Not all of my clients understand why they need to keep on top of internet marketing trends, new techniques, and such. They’re doing more important things and letting me handle their site. Those who do understand and have some knowledge in these areas prefer to pay me to (among other things) stay on top of these things so they don’t have to.

2) I have my own sites to keep ahead of the game. RescueMarketing.com doesn’t have 82 keywords at #1 in the search engines this week because I’m not paying attention to what’s new, what’s working and what isn’t. These things take time, study and investment.

3) There are faculty members and others here that know things I don’t know. Likewise, those with proven success in areas I want to get better at. The best way to find out what I need to know is to get closer to the people who know the things I want to learn more about.

4) The slight edge. What am I willing to do and learn that my competition is too myopic or lazy to do?

Being here is one of those things.

Categories
Competition Customer service

“Problem customers”, Gold, and Fools

There are as many ways to handle “problem customers” as you can think of.

Every single business out there has to do it at some time or another and sure, sometimes the complaint isn’t justified but that is typically irrelevant.

What you have to keep in mind is this: Feedback is GOLDEN and how you handle it makes all the difference in the world to your business over the long term.

You’ll hear various studies stating that a happy customer tells 1, 2, or 3 other people and that an UNhappy customer tells 7 or 10, 11, etc. The exact numbers don’t really matter much. The bottom line is that 1 unhappy customer can undo anywhere from 2 to 11 times the good that 1 happy customer does for you .

Will you ever completely avoid unhappy customers? Not hardly, so let’s talk about how to work with them.

A few things to do with the upset client:

  • Make sure they know that you understand that they’re mad, and that you’d probably be mad as well, if you were in their situation. Don’t just think it…TELL THEM SO.
  • Tell them that you are going to get to the bottom of the issue and do something about it. People are so used to being ignored and told that “call volumes are unexpectedly high and your call is important to us” that they simply assume that they are going to get yanked around these days. One of the easiest and best ways to differentiate yourself is to avoid treating your clients like total crap. I know it seems obvious, but sit and think about the experiences you’ve had as a customer in the last week. Enough said. So few are doing this right that you can easily stand out from the crowd.
  • Tell them you are sorry they had the problem and thank them for bringing it to your attention. Remind them that most people just go somewhere else and never report a problem, and that you appreciate that they cared enough to let you know about it and give you a 2nd chance to fix it. As I mentioned earlier, this is GOLDEN. What you do with them next determines who gets the gold.
  • Ask them what they are expecting from you. Don’t get wordy or pull out the thesaurus and throw $50 words at them. Just ask, plain and simple: What can I do to make you happy? It might not be as much as you expect. How you handle this part of the situation often has long term rewards. Do more than what they expected, do what you’d hope that someone else would do for you, and it’ll turn that client from ticked off to loyal in a heartbeat.
  • Next, DO IT. Implement a solution. Do it quickly, preferably before they leave your store or office.
  • Follow up. Call them a few days later and make sure the solution worked out for them. Send them a card a couple weeks later thanking them for the opportunity to resolve the issue, and note that their feedback is one of the things that makes your company better. Follow up.

Jeffrey Gitomer says this about satisfied customers:

Ask yourself: “Would you rather have a satisfied customer, or a loyal customer?”

If you aren’t sure of the difference, ask yourself this question: “Would you rather that your spouse was satisfied, or loyal?”

Suddenly, there’s quite a difference between those 2 words, isn’t there? 🙂

Don’t you want customers who wouldn’t think of going somewhere else? Loyal customers.

Bear with me, I have a story about one of these complainer -> loyal customer transformations.

Years ago, I had a new client in PA who was kind of a grumpy guy. More often than not, when we talked on the phone, he seemed angry about something. For a bit, I just assumed that he was one of those people who is always mad.

I turned out that part of his frustration was that he was still annoyed with the vendor we bought out, then upgraded to software we offered that solved the same problem. As is natural, he always compared the new one to the old one. He liked the new one, but still, it was different (completely different, in fact).

Not long after his first big upgrade, his first big explosion came. Naturally, it came while I was on the phone with him. He was used to being ignored (perhaps because of his mood) by tech support at other companies, but I took care of him every time he called. This turned him from constantly annoyed at us (just because) to a true ally. He’d bring friends to us and suggest to them that they buy our software, telling them that no one else took care of him and his business like we did.

Later, I met him at a trade show, shared a cold one (or 3) with him and got to know him a little better. The reality was that he, like many in his line of work, was very, very passionate about what he does. He took his work very personally (note the name of this blog<g>).

And the next week when he’d call, he’d often be grumpy.

For the next several years, he was still mildly annoyed when we’d talk to him on the phone, but we had figured out by then that it wasn’t at US. One day, my tech support manager was on the phone with him and he was getting madder and madder. Before long, he had worked himself into a frenzy. Not because of us, just because that was just him and his passion. Sometimes another vendor was the issue and he’d complain to us because we didn’t offer a solution that replaced that company’s product. This time, he was so loud that I could hear this conversation from the adjacent office. I overhead my tech support manager say “Bill, is there something I’ve done to make you angry?” (Of course, Bill isnt his real name). A great question.

He says “No”, immediately goes back to room temperature and resumes the conversation. Passionate people exude their passion in different ways.

The point of my rambling? The worst, biggest pain in the backside of a client is the one that can be the most valuable IF you take the proper steps to cool them off, address their problem (making it YOURS) and assure them that you’re on their side (assuming that you are). I can’t count the number of times I’ve seen, or made, this happen. Every time, it turns the person from what can seem like a mortal enemy into one of the most vocal, loyal clients around.

So the next time that problem client calls,  think about how you can blow them away when solving their problem. Make THAT guy happy and he’ll never stop talking positively about you. You can be sure that lots of people know he tests the businesses he works with. Those same people will hear about the fact that you make him happy in a world where few seem to.

The fools?  The business owner that just hates dealing with this guy because he’s “such a pain”. They don’t know what a diamond in the rough he really is, nor how valuable he can be.

Categories
Competition Direct Mail Entrepreneurs Politics

Every day, someone is trying to put you out of business.

Some days it’s a competitor, or a supplier. Other days, it’s the government bureaucracy by virtue of that ever-increasing pile of paperwork.

And some days, it’s the people you least expect – your legislators.

I spoke a while back about this issue as it related to a misguided “Do not mail” bill that came up in the Montana House.

As annoying as it may seem , you simply MUST keep up with what these people are doing with their “spare time”. At the Federal level, the small business person is in a tough position because your voice is but one in the maelstrom of lobbybucks coming at Senators and US Representatives. But you have to contact them anyhow. If you don’t, you get the government you deserve.

This is one of the best reasons to support the trade organization that lobbies for your industry (assuming you agree with what they do) and similar organizations. No, they aren’t perfect, but they are better than nothing. EVERY business niche has a trade organization of some kind. Sure, some are better than others. Sometimes a local or state trade or business organization is your most effective voice. It all depends on what you do and how interesting your industry is to legislators.

Regardless of how annoying they are, you HAVE to keep contacting them. FYI: Being a nutball is the wrong way. Be concise, avoid jargon and be reasonably polite until they no longer deserve it and then do it anyhow – otherwise you’re wasting your breath.

At the state level, things are different. In many states, these people have real jobs or real businesses that they are concerned about when they aren’t in session. My State rep ( a freshman rep this session ) is a school guidance counselor. Here in Montana, the sessions are every other year and only last a few months. Because the state has a small population, those of us who actively participate in the process (by contacting them when they need it), can get something done.

Still, like any other place, BS partisan politics is present. The 300+ water-related bills in this year’s Montana legislative  session are a fine example.

But I digress:)

The point of all this that the Do Not Mail thing is just an example of what can happen to your business. Don’t assume that direect mail is never going away, any more than you should assume that having an email address and no other contact info is “ok” for your business. EMails change, legislators flip flop.  Get that phone # and mailing address. Use them APPROPRIATELY. Remember – all these Do Not <whatever> bills exist because there are unscrupulous (or just stupid) businesses out there.

Those of you who are starting up and fighting for a toehold are the ones most threatened by these kinds of bills. Why? Because you don’t have all the relationships you need yet.

For more details on the Do Not Mail legislation and the efforts to wake up the legislators who are in favor of it, see the DMA web site ( http://www.dmnews.com ), where you can get and stay up to date on these issues.

Another brief read about the Do Not Mail issue is at http://www.melissadata.com/enews/listadvisor/articles/0704/1.htm 

Categories
Competition Media Montana

There’s a new sheriff in town

As I mentioned a while back, I always find it interesting to see how competition makes people react.

In that arena, it’s been an interesting April already. May is on its way to being interesting as well.

For those who might not be aware, I live in Montana’s Flathead Valley, which is in the northwest part of the state right next to Glacier Park. Columbia Falls is about 50 mi south of the Canadian border (with Alberta). On a map, find Calgary and head south, or Seattle and head east.

Flathead is a large rural county, roughly the size of Rhode Island with an estimated 2006 population of 90k.

There’s 1 daily paper and numerous small weeklies that are all owned by the same company that owns the daily. They’ve all been bought out in the last few years. I know the editor of our weekly, a nice guy who is a photographer at heart (and in practice) and I’m sure he works hard to keep it “our town’s paper”. He’s pretty good about taking contributed pieces about Scouts, swim team and other things I’m involved in and printing them (with pictures) verbatim. I like and appreciate that. I hope it continues.

Here’s why.

There’s a new newspaper coming to town. It’s called the Flathead Beacon ( http://www.flatheadbeacon.com ) and goes live in mid-May. I’ve been asked to contribute a business column, which I’m pretty excited about.

In addition, I will be “in charge” (it remains to be seen exactly what that will mean over the long term) of the Columbia Falls community page in the Beacon.

There are a few REALLY exciting things about this new publication.

  • It will print weekly, but publish online DAILY.
  • It will have a very serious online component. Video, audio, etc. Right now, there’s really nothing in the state that compares with the big city newspaper online sites. With the exception of the very cool NYTimes .net Reader application (Seattle and the London Daily Mail have one too), I expect this site will soon compete nicely with many high end newspaper sites.
  • It is staffed almost completely with U of Montana kids (kids to me) who got their j degrees at UM and then made a serious name for themselves in other cities around the US. Montana kids, trained in Montana, reporting about Montana.
  • Most importantly, it’s a second source of news, opinion and a REAL TIME source of online news – something I think folks will really get charged up about once it hits its stride.

Stay tuned. Business lessons are bound to appear:)

Categories
Competition Marketing

Amazon pump fakes, goes right, dunks.

That’s hard to do in a pair of ladies’ pumps:)

A Cajun friend pointed out to me yesterday that endless.com has an offer going that gives you a $5 discount when you request overnight shipping. I didn’t ask him why he was shopping for ladies shoes. Maybe he has small feet, but I digress.

Yes, you read that right. Change to overnight shipping and get a $5 discount.

This is instructive for several reasons:

  • The profit margin on ladies’ shoes is really nice, even at Amazon prices. A $5 discount looks far bolder than it really is.
  • Shoes are a VERY personal buy. Fit is everything. Getting people to buy them over the net before trying them on is a battle. Getting women to do so, given the generalization that women care a lot more about shoes than guys do (sneakers and hiking boots notwithstanding), is a major challenge.
  • I suspect NO ONE else will follow suit and do this or something similar. I suspect most online shoe stores will look at this, shake their heads and do nothing in response. They think they’re different because they aren’t Amazon (owner of Endless.com).
  • What will brick and mortar shoe stores do? Will they think “Ah, it’s online, we don’t care what they do”. Or will they think back to when small mom and pop bookstores thought the same thing, see a competitor doing something and react?

Finally, do any of Amazon’s competitors ever do anything unique, creative or interesting BEFORE Amazon does? Think about that for a minute, then look in the mirror…

Who is your Amazon?

Categories
Competition Marketing The Slight Edge

How do wireless internet and screaming kids help a brake store get business?

Time. It’s the one thing none of us can change. Whether we’re sleeping, viewing/making Paris Hilton videos, working or climbing Mt Everest – we all get what we get and when the register’s empty, all your family gets is a receipt.

No, this isn’t the April doom and gloom issue. I’m just setting you up for the rest of this post. Its about TIME 🙂

I’m sitting in the McDonald’s Playplace in west Kalispell.

Why? Several reasons.

First, my car is across the street at Midas getting some brake repairs. Now, when you take your car in, something like this can take 10 minutes or 10 hours. Not because Midas doesn’t know what they are doing, but because fixing cars can be a lot like fixing a bug in a computer program. There’s some skill and some science, but there’s also some black magic or kismet or just plain good (or bad) luck.

Ok, so I’m stranded at the car place and I have work to do this afternoon, so I choose my repair shop on 4 criteria:

  1. Do they know what they’re doing?
  2. Can they do it now?
  3. Can I find a place close enough to walk so that I can get to the net and do the work I need to do?
  4. Is there a warranty?

You’ll note that I didn’t mention price. Because these places foolishly position themselves as a commodity service, price isn’t even a consideration. Call around if you wish, but I can tell you that a brake job all over town is within 10 bucks of what I’m paying. There’s a lesson there. Like whatever you do, brake work doesn’t have to be a commodity item, but we’ll talk about that some other time.

So, I call Midas to see if they can get me in because I know MickeyD’s has wireless across the street. Yeah, it’s 2.95 for 2 hours, but if I can’t justify that tiny fee, I need to find a new line of work:) Besides, I get a bottomless Diet Coke for a buck 30.

Midas gets me in at the time I want, right after Rotary plus driving time across town. Truth be told, now that I got a look at their calendar for the next 2 days, I had my choice of all but 4 appointment slots today and 2 tomorrow. They’re not doing too hot at marketing. They have one of the easiest things in the world to sell, yet they aren’t busy. I shouldn’t have been able to get in today, unless they decided to stay late to help me out of a jam.
Yes, I might normally consider getting the work done at a friend’s business, but I don’t have any friends in the auto biz.

Back to why I’m in the Playplace.

Second reason: It’s the location of the only publicly available electric outlet in the building. I know. I look for things like that. Isn’t it odd that the only electricity I can get to is in a place where little kids play? 🙂

Finally, I’m in the Playplace because it smells about 300 times better than the rest of the store. It’s sealed off because of the noise from the kids, but that also keeps the fryer smell out of this area (yes, McD’s needs to invest in better air moving equipment).

Parents seeing me sit here look at me like I’m nuts. How could he work with all these kids running around?

Easy. I have kids. It’s easy to tune out YOUR kids when they cry, squeal, etc – but I can’t tune out mine. Mine, thankfully, are 14 and 18, so they don’t do much of that anymore.
So how does all this relate to why wireless is important to your business?

This Midas store has gained a customer and several grand over the last 8 years simply because they have the things I mentioned earlier (A warranty, the ability to do the work, the time to do the work NOW, and wireless within a block). I can assure you that someone else would have gotten this work if they had those same qualifications and they were closer to my home or office. Your criteria may be different. Those are mine.
If you get my free email newsletter, you know why this is a big deal, because I sign off this way in every issue: “Do at least 1 thing today to get, or keep, a client.”

PS: To get the newsletter, go to https://www.rescuemarketing.com/, and fill in the form on the left side of the page.

Categories
Competition Entrepreneurs Marketing

Tainted dog food, Oprah and the deafening silence

Lately, the big dog and cat food “scandal” regarding the tainted food manufactured by Menu Foods has been all over the news. Poisoned or tainted food, made by the biggest processors in the industry, has been recalled from all over North America.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/03/23/pet.food.recall.ap/index.html?eref=rss_us is just a sample of the press on this topic.

Meanwhile, there’s an amazing, deafening silence from the alternative pet food manufacturers. You may not even realize that they are out there. They really do exist.

A few of them have a brief (1 short sentence) mention, such as “Our food has not been recalled.”, but that’s it.

What a perfect opportunity to get yourself and your pet food company on Oprah (for example) and forever be in the prime grocery shoppers’ minds as “the ONLY safe dog food”. Guaranteed, if you got in touch with their booking agent and offered a 10 lb bag to everyone in the studio audience, and brought a few cute little critters with you, you’d be on in nothing flat. That appearance would likely result in a ton of public relations that would get you on other shows.

If you were a little daring, you might even toss a handful in your mouth and say “Our food is so safe and nutritious, I’ll eat it myself. How’s that for proof?” Next, throw down the dog biscuit and challenge other dog food company CEOs to eat their pet food with your, right there on national tv. No way will anyone else do it.

FYI: 68 million people see Oprah’s show every week, on average. 68 MILLION. That’s almost 1/4th of the US population, folks. Primarily women. Guess who buys the pet food?

But nevermind that, just sit there with Rover at your feet and wait for your distributors to place another order. It’s their job to sell, not yours, right?

Really, really dumb to miss an opportunity this big. This is one of those amazing opportunities in life, like Gates selling IBM something he didnt even have, perhaps with a few less zeroes at the end. Opportunities like this don’t stumble by very often.